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Pages: or anyone in a relationship with a woman & kid? [1]
Author Topic: Or anyone in a relationship with a woman & kid?

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2011-02-08 19-07-24

or anyone in a relationship with a woman & kid? I just don't get it....Mothers out there...Please help me partner thinks its ok to stay the night at her moms house (which lives 2 miles away) because her only son says so.....If you are in a relationship, how is that alright for the other partner???? The mother thinks its no big deal but it is...SHE'S IN A RELATIONSHIP!!!!! Please help me understand.
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2011-02-09 16-30-44

I am so confused.
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    2011-02-09 23-36-06

    Mothers, relationships.AUH!!! i have been in a year relationship with a woman and her 11 yr old son. She let's him do anything and everything! No structure, no dicipline, nothing. Tonight she comes home and tells me he wants to stay the night at his grandmothers house and he wants mommy to stay with him there.......I am trying to understand how my partner thinks it's ok to stay there...she sees the her mother every day and night cause she only lives 2 miles can I think it's not ok for her to stay there and how can she think it's ok...Need HELP!!!!
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    2011-02-10 13-55-26

    dude, you need help alright
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  • sturdivant

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    2011-02-10 22-54-07

    i know..... Any of you out there in a relationship with a mother and ? This is my first (and most likely my last) Do you all think it's cool? I was so upset and she doesn't understand why I am so angry...she thinks its no big deal cause it's just her mom's house.....
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    2011-02-11 9-53-11-

    ok, if you're honestly open to the truth she's right. you're way out of line. if this makes you "so angry" you need to figure out what your real issue is because it shouldn't make you angry that she spends the night once or occasionally at her own mother's house. you shouldn't be angry that she doesn't spend every single night with you even if she is not at her mother's house and even if she didn't have a kid. you seem to have a very unhealthy idea of what it means to be in a relationship.
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    2011-02-11 21-31-19

    here's the thing.... we don't spend much time with fact we don't spend anytime together. We live together, she focus's on her son and I respect her for that.....for example. we just had our year anniversary on wednesday. if i was lucky..i spent maybe a half an hour with her give or take her text messages and talking shop with her employees. I don't ask for much I really don't. am i still wrong?
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  • lechner

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    2011-02-12 2-49-59-

    well that is a different issue than the one you started out with. there's nothing wrong with her spending the night at her mother's. if she's not spending time with you, then you need to address that with her. but you seem to have changed the focus now because you were specifiy upset, as if it were morally wrong, with the possibility of her sleeping at her mother's. if you feel neglected or are upset with her that you didn't celebrate your anniversary then address that with her instead of accusing her of doing something wrong that is totally innocent.
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  • or anyone in a relationship with a woman & kid?
  • halbrook

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    2011-02-12 3-02-30-

    i understand.... I did bring that to her attention... I can see that if we spend a little more time together, then her staying the night would be fine....we do not spend time together the last time we had alone time was in january. i am trying to be understanding; she does everything her son wants to do....yeah, what about me? i am not asking for much am i?
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  • seelman

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    2011-02-12 22-17-44

    I am a mom, well an ex step mom I have always and will always focus far more time on my then on my lovers. It's not something I hide. And if they want me to spend the night at grammas once in awhile, then I will do it. It isn't like when I have a gf I am out at a club, or sleeping with other womyn. I would however invite said gf along. It sounds like your basic issue has less to do with staying with mom, and more to do with deep seeded relationship issues. Also it sounds like you resent the kid, and that is not healthy for eithier of you. To make things clear, both are from a previous relationship. Neithier are my birth ren, and neithier live with me fulltime. But if there is ever a choice between the and time with my partner, it will ALWAYS be my . It was even when I was with their mother. I was the who did the majourity of the raising, nurturing, you name it. You can't be in a relationship where you don't love the kid as much as the mom. Where you aren't as equaly dedicated to the kid as the mom. Where you aren't equal as a parent period. You 2 have a lot to work out, I hope for everybodies sake you manage it.
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